NAPPER TANDY,STAR NEWS CHIEF REPORTER TRIES TO MEASURE WIDTH OF MINISTER MARY HARNEY'S ARSE.
STAR NEWS CENTRE TO NAPPER TANDY.
Come in Napper,is your hangover finally gone?
over and out.
NAPPER TO SKY NEWS CENTRE.
Buck me hangover,i can't find a measuring tape.
STAR NEWS TO NAPPER.
A measuring tape for what purpose,Napper?
NAPPER TO SKY NEWS CENTRE.
For what purpose?
Have you forgotten my assignment?
I was warned by star news chief executive no less not to come back without the
precise measurement of the width of the arse of irish Minister of Hospital Patient Torture and Cruelty,Mary Harney.
Now i could make a good guess of the width of this bessie bunter's arse but yeah,you have it in one,
get the precise measurement i've been told..the precise measurement.
MINISTER MARY HARNEY TO THE PLAIN PEOPLE OF IRELAND AT PRESS INTERVIEW.
our health service in eire,i mean ireland is excellent,the envy of the solar system,we will create centres for excellence in 3021 ad,
i am sure of that.
elderly people tortured,children's kidney's removed by mistake,a mere trifle.
we have paid another fortune to a firm of consutants,i have their name here,yes,the firm of
Bureaucratic Tickbirds and Bone Polishing Consultants Ltd will receive fortunes to tell lies about the irish health service,
of course it will take them years to finish their report.
mmm,i'm really starving you know.
excuse me,while i put another half stone on my fat arse,just let me savage this Kerry Western Fried Hot Battery
Chicken wrap..yum yum,i love food,i love power without responsibility,i love talking shite,i simply love destroying the irish health service.
STAR NEWS TO NAPPER TANDY.
Napper,napper did you get all minister harney's press interview on camera?
and did you get the tape to measure the width of her arse?
NAPPER TO STAR NEWS CENTRE.
Affirmative,her arse measure 11 metres in width but i have a scoop for star news viewers.
ok,i also got the chance to measure minister harney's brass neck but i was unsuccessful,her brass neck is
immeasurable.
let me out of here,after hearing that harney garbage,i'm to the pub for a rake of gargle.
end.
